Fantasy Battles & cool stuff..: BUFFY VS SELENE

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Wednesday, February 28, 2007

BUFFY VS SELENE

FANTASY BATTLES PRESENTS....

With 47% of the vote,

here's the battle you wanted to see ...

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

SELENE THE DEATH DEALER

Buffy slowly walked around the Sunny dale Graveyard looking for the Demon that had reportedly been seen there a few hours earlier. It was dark and every shadow and tombstone took on the form of a demon in Buffy's eyes, but there was nothing, no sign of any Demons and the only noises where the hoots of owls and the wind rustling the leaves of the trees.

" That's it, I,m getting a little tired of dam kids and there overactive imagination, demons and Ghosts in this Graveyard, ya right " Buffy said to herself as she applied more rouge lipgloss and straightened her hair down.

Buffy started to make her way out of the graveyard, when suddenly a glint of light caught her eye in the distance. Buffy walked in the direction of the glint of light. As she got closer she could make out the outline of a tall slender figure, the glinting of light was the moon reflecting of the figures body.

The figure had become aware of Buffy's presence and started to approach her.
Now all was apparent, Buffy could see a tall slim women dressed in tight black PVC and leather emerge from the darkness.

" Hello " The leather clad figure said in a English accent.

" umm Hi , isn't it a bit late to be going to a Fetish party. " Buffy said in a sarcastic manner.

" Fetish ....party... I am Selene , Daughter of Victor .Hunter of lycans, I deal death , and by the way surely you should be tucked up in bed little girl, as the school disco must of finished a while ago." Selene calmly replied.

As Selene was speaking Buffy noticed the unmistakable shape of this Selene's teeth, a VAMPIRES teeth.

" Ahhh ha , looks like I found what I came here for, your toast Demon!! and by the way I am Buffy the vampire slayer and this is my turf. " Buffy said while re applying more rouge lipgloss and pulling a wedgie of her ridiculously tight jeans out her ass.

" That's better, now I can send your pale, spandex clad, greasy haired, Matrix reject ,vampire bitch ass back to where you came from. " Buffy shouted as she pulled a wooden stake out from her waist band.

" I don't want to fight you little girl, I just came here looking for my friend ...Michael. Now step aside and please don't call me a bitch again or it will be the last words your skinny, Prada reject, fake ass, weird nose, fake tits, lip gloss wearing mouth will ever utter....GOT IT!!! " Selene replied in a more forcefull tone.

" BITCH , BITCH , BITCH ,BITCH !! how do you like that Demon, I meen BITCH!!! " Buffy shouted at the top of her lungs.

At that moment, like an unsaid rule, both vixens charged at each other. They both went for a flying scissor kick to the face and collided in mid air, they both tumbled to the ground and then quickly scrambled to there feet again.

They where now circling each other with arms outstretched, looking for the weakness in the other opponent to exploit.

" Your one dead Demon now. " Buffy shouted.

Buffy waded in with lightning fast punches and kicks that Selene was managing to block away until Buffy connected with a wicked looking round house kick to Selene's head. Selene stumbled back and crashed against a Tombstone and broke it in two.

Buffy now went in to finish Selene off once and for all, she back somersaulted her way to within a foot or so of Selene and then leaped high into the air and came down with the stake gripped in both hands ready to plunge it deep into Selene's heart.

In a split second Selene grabbed the broken Tomb stone and held it in front of her as a shield.
CRACK , the stake hit hard into the stone and then Buffy landed fully on top of Selene shattering the Tomb stone all around them.

Now Buffy was laying on top of Selene, they wrestled and wriggled about making Selenes tight PVC outfit squeak and squeal like two mice having a hump. Buffy thought to herself maybe this is why I see Willow smiling when she is wrestling Tara in bed, hmm feels kinda nice...

Buffy's thoughts where soon disturbed by a full on head butt to the face, WHAAM , Buffy fell backwards onto her back. Now Selene had the upper hand, she pounced on top of Buffy and straddled her, pinning Buffy's arms to the ground with her knees.

Selene proceeded to grab Buffy's hair and slam her head into the ground over and over again"Take that you Bitch. " she shouted with every head slam.

Buffy knew she had to react fast otherwise, this situation could really mess up her hair. She managed to get one arm free from Selene's knee and grab a hand full of dirt and throw it at Selene's face.

" ARGHHH " Selene cried as she put her hands to her eyes.Buffy seized the moment and then followed up with an elbow to Selene's face, then she grabbed Selene by the hair and pulled her head to the side, making Selene over balance and fall to the side of Buffy.

Buffy jumped to her feet and scanned the immediate area for the wooden stake, she saw that it was behind Selene who was now regaining her composure and wiping the dirt from her eyes.
Buffy somersaulted over Selene's head and grabbed the stake.

" EWWWWGHHH " Buffy screamed and she looked down at her hands, it was no stake , it was a rather large smelly dog shit that looked like her wooden stake.

" Fucking dogs. " Buffy snarled as she wiped her hands on her new Prada jeans.

Buffy now was in an absolute frenzy, she had only brought the jeans two days ago and she was gonna make Selene pay a heavy price for getting shit on her new jeans and messing up her hair.

Buffy started to foam at the mouth and her eyes widened then she charged Selene and unleashed a hail of evil fists, elbows and kicks into Selene. The Battle was really Hotting up now. Selene managed to survive the initial onslaught of Buffy's attack, but Buffy was really pissed off over the whole dog shit on her new Jeans incident.

" WAIT! " Selene screamed just a Buffy was starting her second frenzied assault. " LOOK !! "

Buffy stopped dead in her tracks. " Do you think i'm stupid.... I'm not going to fall for that old look behind you trick you dumbass Demon. "

" No but really LOOK, you've dropped your Rouge lipgloss and you could do with a touch up. "Selene said as she pointed to the floor.

Buffy just couldn't resist her instincts of Vanity, she had made countless series of Buffy the vampire slayer and fought hundreds of the worst Demons the hellmouth could offer and not once had her Lipgloss ever got smudged or worn off and she wasn't about to start now.

" Really .... where is it! " Buffy anxiously screamed scanning the floor for her beloved lipgloss.

Selene took her opportunity and while Buffys head was down scanning the ground , Selene ran up to her and kneed her straight in the face WHAAAACK.

Buffy slumped to the floor face first into some more fresh

dog shit..Selene looked round and saw a huge metal crucifix on a near by grave, she grabbed the cross and snapped it off.

" REST IN PIECES SHIT FACE. " Selene screamed as she plunged the metal cross through the back of Buffy and into the ground beneath.

It was over, the graveyard fell silent. All that could be heard was the hoots of owls and the wind rustling the leaves of the trees once again ..only now there was a slight odour of dog poo riding on the breeze..

Selene held her nose and turned away from her beaten opponent and started to walk away into the darkness with a squeak , squeak , squeak from her PVC butt hugging outfit.